par·a·noi·a - /perəˈnoiə/ - noun

Conspiracy Agendas: see paranoia


I recently got a new client for my consulting business. They are a large organization with branches in Rome, London, Berlin and somewhere they just refer to as ’51’. I thought they were referring to 51st in New York, but they say it’s out west somewhere.

 They have not said what the actual name of the organization is and their business cards read simply ‘Control Everything’, catchy but a bit ominous.

 Not even real sure where I’m working, they pick me up in a big black Escalade. They really went overboard on the window tint, I can’t see a thing through the windows.

 They seem nice and even offer free lunch. No one seems to go out for lunch, but thats OK, the cafeteria offers a nice selection of genetically modified food.

 They have me working with their ‘Transgender Agenda’. My job is to help shape policy and they have given me access to data collected from other divisions. I can see that their success rate has varied over the years.

 For example the ‘Anti-Slave Agenda’ managed to mostly stop the practice of just capturing humans and calling them your slave. Now you have to do it financially . But the ‘Black Agenda’ has left large potions of the population still not black. Same is true with the ‘Gay Agenda', many of those damn heterosexuals just won't change.

 I think it was their recent defeat in Houston that caused them to look for some outside ideas. They already are doing a good job of slipping hormones into unsuspecting places, like milk, GNO’s and most fast food. Being a computer nerd I have suggested replacing malware ads with links to sissy hypnosis sites. This could soften up a place like Houston before attempting another run at their agenda. 

They certainly have their job cut out for them. Maintaining public secrecy for such a large organization while constantly manipulating the whole world is a big job. But they are well funded and have had centuries of experience hiding in plane sight.