Give it some time

 Being Trans It's easy to get wrapped up entirely in yourself. I spent untold hours studying hair, makeup, clothes and shapeware. When I came out to my kids, my daughter spent hours teaching me how to walk, sit, stand, and in general how to behave like a lady.

 All so the world would perceive me the way I perceived myself. I was completely focused on what people thought of me. 

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I’m married, to an incredible woman, who gives me her unconditional support. Dressing at home was never a problem. She encouraged it and was genuinely excited for me.

 But when I left the house with her, she had to consider how people perceived her. My change caused a big change in her life as well.

 At first she was very uncomfortable, not prepared for the public perception of her.  She was a woman who has been married, to a man, for 35 years. She liked that perception and was not happy with being perceived as having a girlfriend. 

 So we pretended just to be ‘good friend. Never holding hands, never showing affection public.  Sometimes I would put physical distance between us so people would not know that we were together.

 That was a while ago, and things have changed. I noticed a few weeks ago, shopping for groceries together that she was not distant. She was happy, laughing and joking with me. She stood close, touched my arm and would lean in to speak in my ear.

 The real kicker came one weekend recently. We had gone out for dinner and afterwards went to a club to listened to a Jazz band.  We were publicly very affectionate. Sitting very close, talking close and touching each other. Eventually she leaned in and kissed me very passionately. 

 Later she would tell me ‘ I just don’t care what people think about us!’

It took time for her to adjust, to become comfortable with this new life I had shoved upon her. 

 But she has, and I couldn't be happier!