"Change is inevitable, change is constant." -Benjamin Disraeli, 1804-1881
“The only constant is change.” -Heraclitus, 535BC-475BC
Change is something that every transgender has thought about for most of their lives. It is something that we desire, but with an impossible trait. We want it to be instant, which is inconsistent. And according to some philosophers, it can't be.
When I was a child, I thought up many scenarios that would bring about instant change in myself. Just -Insert Scenario- and poof, I was a girl. There are endless stories, comics and videos that do the same thing: A man meets, and irritates a witch, so she turns him into a girl - A Scientific experiment gone wrong and the male scientist finds himself growing breasts. This one has many variations, but I always loved the poorly rated movie 'Dr. Jeckyll & Ms. Hyde'. There are plenty of examples on the web. The central theme of these is inconsistent change. We are one thing and instantly, or almost, we become another.
The real world just does not work that way. Change is very often painfully slow. Evolution takes years, sometimes millions of years, to effect change. Humans did not crawl out of the sea and immediately stand on two legs. It took 16-17 million years for water to change a flat featureless landscape into the Grand Canyon.
Day to day it's all but impossible to notice change, even when it exists. I see my same face in the mirror everyday, but it's changing, as is everyones. I'm trying to steer this change the direction I want. And through modern chemistry, it's slowly doing its job. This has forced me, an inpatient personality by nature, to embrace the benefits of patience.
When we change ourselves, the people around us see it as inconsistent. Here we are, looking and acting in what they consider a normal fashion, then suddenly we are radically different. Society is currently undergoing culture shock. A year ago transgender was an almost unknown phenomena, now it's common knowledge. Our spouses, children and friends have a mental image of who we always have been, and now it is inconsistent with who we are. Many of us are very lucky to be surrounded by intelligent, loving understanding people, and I count myself in this group. -I think my support group is the model by which all others should be judged.- But for many this is not the case.
We, particularly in the trans community, need to keep this in mind. It applies to changing physically, changes in society, changes in laws, and most importantly in those we love. Be patient, not only with yourself, but with everything and everyone around you.
And remember that the only thing constant is change.